Why my mother walked me down the aisle — Chimamanda Adichie

Acclaimed Nigerian author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie shared pictures from her 2009 wedding in which both her mother and father walked her down the aisle.

Adichie had formerly kept the pictures from her wedding to Ivara Esege away from the public eye. But in an Instagram post on Wednesday, the 43-year-old shared photos where her parents James Adichie and Ifeoma Adichie, who both died between 2020 and 2021, walked alongside her on her wedding day.

In the caption accompanying the pictures, Adichie revealed that she was the one who instructed her friends and family members not to share the photos publicly. She also called out the Western wedding traditions that sidelined the mother of the bride.

Adichie said her desire to honour her late mother influenced her decision to share the wedding photos. The writer also sought to inspire those rising up to challenge such traditions. Adichie disclosed that she allowed her both parents to walk her down the aisle to break such traditions which allow only assign the role to the bride’s father. She also shared a picture of herself and her mother dancing together.

Check out the post below:

Adichie wrote, “I felt that western wedding traditions sideline the mother of the bride — the father walks the bride down the aisle, the father has the first dance with the bride, often the father gives a speech while the mother doesn’t,” she wrote.

“Our wedding, many years ago, was small and lovely, just as we wanted it. I asked family and friends not to post any photos publicly. I wanted privacy. But my need for privacy is now superseded by my desire to publicly honour the rare and wonderful woman I called my mother. I hope this perhaps inspires any young women (and men) out there who are questioning any kind of convention.⁣”

“I decided my first dance would be with my mother.”

“Convention is something made up by somebody and then repeated by others. If convention feels wrong for you, if your skin bristles and your spirit stalls at the thought of doing something ‘the way it is done,’ then stop and act’⁣

“And my mother’s joy on that day was a gorgeous glowing thing.⁣ We can make changes. We can try and craft small slices of the life we want. ⁣We can unmake convention to make things more just, more complete, more beautiful.⁣

“Not everyone will be happy with you because it is human nature to try and conserve things as they are. But your spirit will feel full, and there is nothing more meaningful than knowing you have been true to yourself.”

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